I hit my lowest. I cried the most tears I've ever cried in my whole life. If I had any consolation, it was that this happened during Yuan's exams week and Christmas week. At least, I was busy. But tears would fall every time I'm alone and had nothing to do. I reached my limits in sadness, tolerance, patience and disappointments. I knew it was building up and this month little Miss "Okay lang" broke down. Suddenly, nothing seemed to be "okay lang" anymore. It's like I've been slapped with the realities of life - my misses, my faults, my flaws, my too much assumptions. I felt rejected, under appreciated, tired, lonely, sad, depressed. I felt I was a failure in so many ways. I lost my self-esteem.
But God is good and Paul was with me throughout the ordeal. I haven't fully recovered, but I've stopped crying and I'm hopeful that I will be better-than-okay soon...:)
No comments:
Post a Comment